Bwahaha.
Verily, for I say unto thee, go here and read.
Amen, n' stuff.
ETA: Ruh-Roh, for those with no FB account, try here.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Powndouchery
One of the greatest gifts the Corps has given me is the ability to determine the potential FAIL of others rather than learning by my own failage. Granted, this is a rather easy example, doesn't take much to figure out which way this one is going to go, but it did make me chuckle.
Helpful suggestions for teh internets:
- Get off of 'em every once in a while.
- Don't piss n' moan about the Significant Other...
- ... especially if she works 50 hours a week, takes a full load of classes, and is your baby momma.
- If you do decide to piss n' moan about the SO, understand that it might come back to bite you in the ass.
- Leaving your account logged in is an open invite to getting bit in the aforementioned ass, you ass.
- Learn to quit while your not too far behind.
Sure there are more suggestions, but I've not finished reading the over 100 pages of peanut gallery color commentary.
ETA: read Page 1 for the the set up, then Page 2 for her response. After that, it appears to all be icing on the cake, especially when the douchnozzle keeps responding...
Friday, April 9, 2010
Been thinking about political asshattery in general, and a few politicians in specific. I try not to dwell on things too much, 'cause, well, there's only just so much bs that I find I can stand, nowadays. I thought it was interesting when my chain of thought took a different track, of sorts.
It started with Georgia's finest, opining on the possibility of military folks decidin' to up and go Guam tippin'...
Bounced around a bit, and then landed on another 'Call me Senator' who apparently got their panties in a bunch in re: the grievous insult of being called, "Ma'am". (Loved how she didn't address him as General during that little exchange, that was the topping on the cake!)
After some twists and turns, my little train wound up on sections of just about every General Petraeus clip that I've heard...
What's the connection, you ask? Political asshattery? Well, yes, but more so than that, was, the bearing of the Admirals and Generals when they have to deal with politicians.
Now, I've done my fair share of pissin' and moanin' about the really-really higher ups, but for the most part, it was more about them than directly because of them. Gettin' to formations 5 hours prior, hand scrubbing an already friggin' immaculate floor in a back room of the out-of-the-way berthing area on ship because the Division's CG is visiting in the same port as us, running fake personal security details / low-tech mine sweeping ops in Iraq, that sort of thing.
I've had to directly, face to face deal with stupid (much lower ranking) Officer questions, but truth be told, they were long and few in between, and for the most part, I'd give 'em credit; they didn't know something, so instead of pretending to be totally on the ball they put it out there and asked someone who did know what was going on. Good on 'em, sorta.
But what struck my mind when thinking about these incidents, and what I'm probably going to keep a look out for in the future is, their bearing. In all of the above mentioned scenes, there was no scoffing, snorting, wtf-ing, laughing, mouth-dropping, or hell, any kind of reaction other than the 100% professional response.
Is there some sort of Command-Staff College Poker class for advanced players going on out there? Holy Hey Zeus, can you imagine if the military got tired of the BS and just informed everyone that any and all future hearings would be responded by Gunny Ermey? Now there's a show I'd like to watch...!
It started with Georgia's finest, opining on the possibility of military folks decidin' to up and go Guam tippin'...
Bounced around a bit, and then landed on another 'Call me Senator' who apparently got their panties in a bunch in re: the grievous insult of being called, "Ma'am". (Loved how she didn't address him as General during that little exchange, that was the topping on the cake!)
After some twists and turns, my little train wound up on sections of just about every General Petraeus clip that I've heard...
What's the connection, you ask? Political asshattery? Well, yes, but more so than that, was, the bearing of the Admirals and Generals when they have to deal with politicians.
Now, I've done my fair share of pissin' and moanin' about the really-really higher ups, but for the most part, it was more about them than directly because of them. Gettin' to formations 5 hours prior, hand scrubbing an already friggin' immaculate floor in a back room of the out-of-the-way berthing area on ship because the Division's CG is visiting in the same port as us, running fake personal security details / low-tech mine sweeping ops in Iraq, that sort of thing.
I've had to directly, face to face deal with stupid (much lower ranking) Officer questions, but truth be told, they were long and few in between, and for the most part, I'd give 'em credit; they didn't know something, so instead of pretending to be totally on the ball they put it out there and asked someone who did know what was going on. Good on 'em, sorta.
But what struck my mind when thinking about these incidents, and what I'm probably going to keep a look out for in the future is, their bearing. In all of the above mentioned scenes, there was no scoffing, snorting, wtf-ing, laughing, mouth-dropping, or hell, any kind of reaction other than the 100% professional response.
Is there some sort of Command-Staff College Poker class for advanced players going on out there? Holy Hey Zeus, can you imagine if the military got tired of the BS and just informed everyone that any and all future hearings would be responded by Gunny Ermey? Now there's a show I'd like to watch...!
Monday, March 22, 2010
It's Been That Kind Of Day
source.Been there, done that, got the t-shirt, bumper sticker, and new set of cammies, afterward. Didn't find it humerous at the time, if I recall, but it sure puts a smile on my face, nowadays...
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Pop Quiz
When, at the range, your pistol mounted gun-light decides to abandon ship upon nearly every shot, it is properly classified as a:
a) weapon or gear malfunction
b) operator error
c) Bush's fault
d) a theoretical enemy diversional tactic
e) karma for pretending your previous shit-hot shooting was anything but pure luck.
a) weapon or gear malfunction
b) operator error
c) Bush's fault
d) a theoretical enemy diversional tactic
e) karma for pretending your previous shit-hot shooting was anything but pure luck.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Semper Fi...
... now with extra Moto!
I recently read about this salty senior Lance Corporal in a recent Marine Corps Times, if I recall correctly. Interestingly enough, he has a website. Read the 'toons and the articles beneath, from crazy libo attire, nicknames, the big green weenie, and p.o.ed SNCO-HMFICs, he's done a bit of the same stuff that I've written about, just funnier. Good thing he's getting out, doesn't take a genius to figure out that someone, somewhere, eventually would get all butt-hurt about one of the strips sooner or later. Hopefully, he keeps up with his page now that he's rejoining the really-real world.
No comment from my peanut gallery, m'kay?
Also, a slight word of caution, it is a strip about Marines, so there are going to be the occasional creative variations on the f-word, references to lower-orifice recreational activities, and the like.
Also also speaking of the like, if one should find themselves on Facebook, one should look up a page for F'N Boot!. Marines of a certain type of humor, likely grunts, are probably going to wax nostalgic whilst trying mightily not to spew coffee (or pee) all over the place. And that's just for the wall comments. Venture on to check out the pictures (and related comments) for that page at your own risk. I did mention that Marine grunts would like it, right? Let me put it this way, I'm reluctant to even link from here, if that's telling you anything. Some pictures (but mostly comments) are definitely not suitable for polite, mixed, adult, civi, or any other type of company.
Ever.
Hell, I'm offended by some of 'em.
They tend to go off on anyone who's ever been; a boot Marine, female, reservist, infantry, non-infantry, Officer, on camera sober, on camera drunk, in blues & alphas, on downtime in the States or deployed, tattooed, - basically, anyone who isn't a unanimously acknowledged bad-ass of Marine Corps combat history. Mostly hilarious, in other words.
'Special Attention' is bestowed to those who are photographed while wearing uniforms and awards not legitimately earned.
Should you happen to check out the pics, my personal favorite at the moment (and coincidentally enough my current desktop image at the house), is this one.
Yeah, it's that kind of page.
No comment from my peanut gallery, m'kay?
Also, a slight word of caution, it is a strip about Marines, so there are going to be the occasional creative variations on the f-word, references to lower-orifice recreational activities, and the like.
Also also speaking of the like, if one should find themselves on Facebook, one should look up a page for F'N Boot!. Marines of a certain type of humor, likely grunts, are probably going to wax nostalgic whilst trying mightily not to spew coffee (or pee) all over the place. And that's just for the wall comments. Venture on to check out the pictures (and related comments) for that page at your own risk. I did mention that Marine grunts would like it, right? Let me put it this way, I'm reluctant to even link from here, if that's telling you anything. Some pictures (but mostly comments) are definitely not suitable for polite, mixed, adult, civi, or any other type of company.
Ever.
Hell, I'm offended by some of 'em.
They tend to go off on anyone who's ever been; a boot Marine, female, reservist, infantry, non-infantry, Officer, on camera sober, on camera drunk, in blues & alphas, on downtime in the States or deployed, tattooed, - basically, anyone who isn't a unanimously acknowledged bad-ass of Marine Corps combat history. Mostly hilarious, in other words.
'Special Attention' is bestowed to those who are photographed while wearing uniforms and awards not legitimately earned.
Should you happen to check out the pics, my personal favorite at the moment (and coincidentally enough my current desktop image at the house), is this one.
Yeah, it's that kind of page.
Friday, March 5, 2010
Pshaw, Whippersnappers
Not too terribly long ago, I was over at a track, killin' time trying to get a feel for how my shins were. I was wandering around looking for a semi dry spot to stretch when I saw something that caught my eye.
A pair of ratty old USMC issued PT sweatpants.
I sidled up to the owner of said sweatpants and asked the ever popular gettin' to know you question, "So, who're'you with?"
He told me his old unit, and it just so happened that it was the same bunch that my unit relieved over in Iraq.
"Great outfit, says I", deciding that my shins were merely tender (and thankfully not worse), "good group of guys. We actually relieved y'all at Camp Cupcake in '04..." I prattled off, reliving some fond memories.
He let me continue for a while, doing his own stretches, before he interrupted with a grunt and a "Sheeit dude, I wasn't there way back in 2004, I was in boot camp then."
"Way back", sheesh.
A pair of ratty old USMC issued PT sweatpants.
I sidled up to the owner of said sweatpants and asked the ever popular gettin' to know you question, "So, who're'you with?"
He told me his old unit, and it just so happened that it was the same bunch that my unit relieved over in Iraq.
"Great outfit, says I", deciding that my shins were merely tender (and thankfully not worse), "good group of guys. We actually relieved y'all at Camp Cupcake in '04..." I prattled off, reliving some fond memories.
He let me continue for a while, doing his own stretches, before he interrupted with a grunt and a "Sheeit dude, I wasn't there way back in 2004, I was in boot camp then."
"Way back", sheesh.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
It Walks, It Talks...
Well, not really, but y'all already knew that.
See, what had happened was that families, doing what they do, tend to expand with the additions of new little ones. A particular little one, curious and with a mischievous monkey-like climbing abilities, managed to apparently to defeat the eagle eye of his mommy, hump up a set of stairs, and either did a max set of pull-ups on the fancy bed blanket thing or directly onto the bedside hooya where I kept my laptop.
Yup, "kept".
Seems to me that HP make a pretty good laptop, as it was fairly old, and considering who used it (moi), you can bet it was pretty much the definition of used hard and put up wet.
It was not, apparently, drop proof.
I thought it was a cute touch, however, when My Love had placed the laptop back on my bedside thingy (table? dresser?), with the power cable's new jaunty 45 degree angle connection to the laptop, and all but completely recessed into the body of the laptop.
Yeah, it was kaput. Would've cost more to fix it than it was worth, all my pics were duped onto the pc and on disc... so, yeah, it's sitting up on my closet shelf, perhaps waiting for a final use at the range, one of these days...
You might be pleased to know that while I declined to mete out any punishment due to the young age of the offender (under 3), not even researching local and country-wide orphanages, I have started a runing countdown, all for the momma's sake, of course, of when that little booger turns of legal age to be sent away to Marine boot camp.
Internet access has been apparently noticeably sporadic since, but hopefully, not too much longer.
Yup, "kept".
Seems to me that HP make a pretty good laptop, as it was fairly old, and considering who used it (moi), you can bet it was pretty much the definition of used hard and put up wet.
It was not, apparently, drop proof.
I thought it was a cute touch, however, when My Love had placed the laptop back on my bedside thingy (table? dresser?), with the power cable's new jaunty 45 degree angle connection to the laptop, and all but completely recessed into the body of the laptop.
Yeah, it was kaput. Would've cost more to fix it than it was worth, all my pics were duped onto the pc and on disc... so, yeah, it's sitting up on my closet shelf, perhaps waiting for a final use at the range, one of these days...
You might be pleased to know that while I declined to mete out any punishment due to the young age of the offender (under 3), not even researching local and country-wide orphanages, I have started a runing countdown, all for the momma's sake, of course, of when that little booger turns of legal age to be sent away to Marine boot camp.
Internet access has been apparently noticeably sporadic since, but hopefully, not too much longer.
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