Saturday, May 9, 2009

Is this thing still on...?

What the hell, am I made of money?


Awhile back when My Love first pitched the idea of cutting back her hours at the office, she mentioned that she could always return to full-time hours, if needed. As I am the somewhat reluctant 'saver' in the relationship and she the buck-wild, former credit card melting, bane of savings accounts everywhere, patron saint of sales clerks' childrens college funds etc etc, I immediately told her she needed to stay full time. Heck, pick up some OT, while she was at it.

After further discussion, we decided that it would be a good idea for her to go part-time.


She's now gone from part-time to no-time, at that job.


Now that she's 'spending' (meh) alot more time at the house, making plans for future upgrades, paint-schemes, redecorating, future purchases and the like, I've been putting in quite a bit of time outside of the house, in the yard. Now, before I get to much further, I should mention that we're fortunate in that her quitting her job is not the end of the world, financially. (I just like to piss and moan). As it looks, we might have to tighten our belts a bit, but nothing that'll lead to me hanging out on the corner showin' a little leg... yet.

Back to the yard.

My yard is lookin' awesome.

Know what really helps out, yard maintenance-wise, besides a wife that's planning to paint the downstairs bathroom for the 12th time?

That's right, the recent run on ammo.

See, I haven't actually bought ammo for a quite a few months now, and while I'm not resigned to collecting rocks for slingshots or anything, I've started to keep an eye on my 'cache', with a mind to conservation. The question arose then of what to do with my ammo acquisition funds. I was mowing my rocks and weeds one day, thinking these deep thoughts, when the mowers started kicking up something totally unexpected. No, it wasn't forgotten lawn ornaments, my feet, feral cats, or small children, but grass. Lush, thick, green grass.

Yeah, 'WTH' was my thought, as well.

I remembered the fertilizer and composts that I was playing around with a couple years back. I had bought a few different type of compost, place some here, scattered some there, and in the end usually managed to sequester roughly half the bag in my pants cuffs for the trip inside the house. It worked pretty good, but after a buddy mentioned some types of fertilizer, I made a trip over to the local Home Depot. I bought a bag, brought it home, poured the stuff in the spreader, and started out. Of course something came up, as it usually does (if I remember correctly it was buying antique furniture), and the bag o' fertilizer spent a bit more time in the spreader than is probably recommended.

I believe it was about 3 or 4 months-ish.

Come spring time (of '08), I dragged the spreader out of the garage, and promptly dropped the ass-end of the spreader (and the solidified fertilizer it held) onto the driveway. I'm not a pro, but I figured that fertilizer on the driveway wouldn't help out too much, and the solid mass of of fertilizer should probably go in the yard. It wasn't all solid,though, there was some brownish liquid that spread out quite nicely with a healthy application of the hose. There was a strip of 'grass' between one side of my driveway and the neighbor's yard that was my lawn-products test strip, so that's where the fertilizer went. All of it (enough for most of the front and back yards) went in that strip.

So here we are, more than a year later, and I have some sort of mutant grass in that strip that grows roughly three inches by the time I've finished mowing it, isn't afraid to reach up and turn the spigot for itself when it gets thirsty, and, (coincidence?) the neighbor lady's cat Fluffy is still missing.

So yeah, I've been putting down compost and fertilizer all over the rest of the yard, in an effort to help it catch up to the mutant-strip.

That, putting in some plants and flowers, re-planting the flowers that died right after planting, replanting those flowers that somebody *innocent whistle* forgot (again?) to water, digging a garden we wanted, filling in the preliminary holes that we dug when we decided that we wanted our garden in a slightly different position, and well, that's what I've been doing for the past month or so.


Hammer said...

I'm trying to put the kibosh on family spending for the time being at least until things get better..

It's easier said than done because credit cards have little mind control devices in them that tell women.."buy it buy it you know you want to..."

Anonymous said...

Come over to my house when you're done with your yard... it's a sad miserable wreck right now because I'm putting in the OT at work and there's only one of me at home... so outside doesn't get done. boo hoo for me right? I'd much rather be working outside than in front of the computer these days... especially with this nice weather.

Upside... I get to be the saver AND the spender. muhahahah Life of a single... :-D

Snigglefrits said...

You're fertilizing and I'm calculating how much Round Up would be necessary to eradicate every living thing in my yard.

Glad you're alright Murphy, was beginning to wonder if the earth had swallowed you.

Old NFO said...

Good to "see" you back- We were getting worried you'd fallen off the planet! and yeah, yard work is "such" fun... NOT

Sabra said...

Yay, you're back!

I am completely opposed to stuff like watering the lawn. Used to get in all sorts of trouble in base housing, as you can imagine.

I'm trying to grow tomatoes, though. I have three pathetic little HEB plants in a gigantic planter right beside the door. I actually remember to water it most days. They're not dead yet, & I think it's been about a month. That's some kind of record for me.

Bob G. said...


Yard work...(rolls eyes) what can I say that you haven't already said (and with a lot more "humor")?

We've ALL been there, and most of us are STILL "doing it".

We can't get grass to grow WHERE we want it to, but it LOVES to grow everywhere else. can't live with 'em and you can't shoot 'em. (effectively that is at ANY range)

Rock gardens, water gardens, flower gardens, herb gardens...and most of us wind up with CLOVER or WEED gardens...LOL.

Critters on four feet, kids running all over, and assorted 6 & 8 legged varmints moving in JUST when we get things as we want them...(yay).

If you have an awesome yard, count yourself among the fortunate ones.
All the work that you put into it WILL, eventually pay off.

(unless some act of nature decides otherwise)

Then we get to do it ALL over again...LOL!

Glad to see you back in action, Sarge.
Another great tale that has me smilin'!

Carry On.

SpeakerTweaker said...

I just can't water my yard that much. We NEVER get rain around here anymore, and I'm not gonna triple my water bill to have some light green grass that isn't strong enough to fill in the gaps between tufts of the next nearest grass because my city water sucks arse.

I remember not long after we moved in, though, when it rained buckets pretty regularly. I had the thickest, darkest green yard imaginable.

Ahh, those were the days. Now it looks like I'm raising straw.


Hope the yard stays nice.


Murphy said...

Hammer - "I'm trying to put the kibosh on family spending..." I tried that once and it wasn't pretty. Now I more of an Al Bundy-type...

Alaina - I just might come over, I could use the cash!

Snigs - Not missing, just battling the 'stripper jungle'.

Old NFO - It's a lot better than repainting whatever room is on the schedule. I have a strict four coat maximum.

Sabra - Yeah, I killed some tomatoes in my time. Just killed a pretty good lookin' squash plant that a buddy gave me, but it was my first one actually planted in the garden, so I dunno if it even actually counts...

Bob G. - Recently, I was plucking grass from around my trees and pampas the other day, thinking about what you said, and muttering friggin' amen every five minutes or so.

SpeakerTweaker - Heck, if you want it to rain, just wash your car. I washed mine the other day, and take a wild guess if it's pissin' down here now...

Anonymous said...

Its called a SOIL TEST The local extension service will provide you with a box and instructions for a small fee ~25.00 some places it is free. You will get a report back telling you exactly what your yard needs. No more over fertilizing where the unused nutrients runoff polluting lakes, rivers and streams or buying organic compost at Wally world that is essentially 0-0-0- that does nothing except deplete your pocketbook and stoke your ego because you think you are saving the planet by using it. The area you put the solid fertilizer in will continue to grow like kudzu. The brown stain is iron and won’t hurt anything or go away quickly.

The feller worried about his Maters needs to sprinkle a handful of lime over each plant and all will be good